I will step back and let Him lead the way.

Opinion on Lesson 155 from the workbook for students in “A Course in Miracles”

I awoke this morning from a very good sleep, and I just lay there in bed thinking “the dots need to be connected properly right now, and then I’m going to have a great day!” I was actually thinking those words when I made the transition from that dream world into this one. So I lay there for a while longer, going over the rules for decision that are laid out in the text of “A Course In Miracles”, for the set up of the subconscious mind, to run these thoughts into my conscious mind. I’m going to have a happy day, a peaceful day, and an all around healthy day.   It’s usually best to do this upon awakening for myself, when I’m coming from the borderland of subconscious to consciousness, or my waking state. So after about ten minutes of ruminating, I get up out of bed, and put all the bedding stuff away, (I have a Murphy bed) and then head downstairs to make some coffee. I’m feeling pretty good, and not focusing on any worldly concerns, other than my pressing need to overcome my insane addiction to cigarettes. I am always in the classroom of life, and I am constantly being given lessons to overcome the obstacles to peace, and I just have to be aware or awake enough to notice them.

I set up the coffee to brewing mode, and then I pick up my iPhone and look at the lesson for the day in the “A Course In Miracles” app, and it, on this days lesson says, “I will step back and let Him lead the way.” Well fancy that, what a coincidence! I find myself reading these lines from lesson 155 in the workbook of A.C.I.M and for the purposes of this blog; I have made inserts as denoted by the parentheses, or brackets.

“This is the simple choice we make today. The mad illusion (that I actually smoke, and can’t stop, which is a sick decision, or error, that I’ve made up in my mental construct to be real) will remain awhile in evidence, for those to look upon who chose to come, and have not yet rejoiced to find they were mistaken in their choice. They cannot learn directly from the truth, because they have denied that it is so. And so they need a Teacher Who perceives their madness, but Who still can look beyond illusion to the simple truth in them. I’m in a very good learning situation right now, and my seemingly “impossible mission,” should I decide to accept it, is to avail myself of help from a teacher, the subconscious, inner guide, or power greater than myself (it doesn’t matter what a person calls this power, it is what it is. I prefer the symbolic illusion of Jesus) to overcome this little conscious lie of “i, me, and mine.” With this “in all ways” newfound Power, I can get rid of the nasty addiction to cigarettes! (I can’t smoke in the 10 day silent retreat that’s coming up in a few days, and I don’t want to be detoxing from the weed when I get there as that could seriously affect the outcome of the inward journey into mindfulness)

I’ve been a slave, to a lot of people, places, and things in my time down here on the planet. With the help that I have had, and have been given, I have overcome lots of different addictions. My earliest enslavement, my latest one, and most current addiction is the one of smoking cigarettes. This little stick has had me cornered for a long time, and that little tube encased weed really concerns me, and leaves me feeling imprisoned, and now is a good opportunity, to really get down to it, to the heart of the matter, and butt out. It’s A great time to get the “me” and “I” that “i” think “I am”, out of the way! I am a child of God, and children love to do nutty things, and when the child starts playing with a razor blade it is time to take it away, no matter how shiny and appealing it might appear to the child! And it’s so simple it’s ridiculous, but I’m stupid in this regards, and I can’t perceive my own best interest, so I’m going to smoke a cigarette, and let it run my life! How bizarre is that?

Another word for stupid might be irrational, or better yet, insane, and we all know the definition of that word! It is trying the same experiment over and over again and expecting different results! I am somehow nuts enough to think I can repeatedly put my hand on a hot stove and not feel the pain! Tolerance for pain maybe high but it’s not without limit. And by wishing and trying on my own little power, I am not going to stop this addiction! Every single person on this planet has experienced, or is aware of an addiction currently. If you need a few ideas, here are a few of the most common addictions : worrying, control, money, property, power, prestige, food, booze, drugs, sex, reading, shopping, exercise, TV, hoarding, and our all time North American favorite, the addiction to “more of anything”! Anything, anybody or anyplace, that makes you feel less than, or that takes your focus away from having life is our becoming a slave to the little “me”. If they insist that they are not in some way, or have never had an addiction, they are in a state of what is called in psychological terms, denial: Don’t Even kNow I Am Lying.    To overcome an addiction, or being a slave or prisoner to something or someone, is all about the development of trust in an alternate guide, thing or source, and am I going to step back? Am I going to stay hostage to this false self?  Or am I going to step back and let Him lead the way out of this quagmire? Jesus tells me with certainty in this lesson, “there is another road that leads away from loss of every kind, for sacrifice and deprivation both are quickly left behind. This is the way appointed for you now.”

This quitting smoking mumbo-jumbo is ridiculous to my higher mind. I don’t have to quit anything. I’m just going to stop, and become trusting, that the way will be shown. How much energy will “I” to have to put into this thing? And how much is that going to run me in cost to overcome this? Once again the Master speaks, “There is no cost, but only gain. Illusion can but seem to hold in chains the holy Son of God. It is but from illusions he is saved. As they step back, he finds himself again. (My opinion on this last sentence is that Jesus is telling us that the folks that are following our example of getting out of slavery are going to be a witness for you to what you have accomplished in the “one mind”. This doesn’t mean I am going to proselytise, or run around telling everyone about the evils of smoking! Throughout history we have lots of examples of that kind of nonsense! Prohibition for one, when people actually started drinking more! The latest one that has repeatedly hit the headlines is trying to stop people from taking drugs! Its as crazy as telling someone to stop thinking certain thoughts!  It has always been my observation that people stop something when they decide to; it simply means that when I am healed it is going to help the “One” collective unconscious mind be healed along with mine.)

It is so cool when you do “overcome” a seemingly specific addiction,  and become that much more of  the “Real You” that is not a hostage, nor slave, to the false self that is all just made up in our mind. When I feel that new power, or insight, flow into my being that is not of myself, I can clearly see my way out of jail. I get a “go free” card in this little magical mystery tour that we are all taking part in. I am no longer a victim to a dumb thought! I can almost breathe the air of Heaven again! I have done it before and I can do it again. We all get by with a little help from our friends, and the one friend that is with me all the time, is the one that inhabits this body! Would I wish smoking tobacco products onto a friend? That would be a sick thing to wish for. Why would I want to keep this noose around my own neck? The answer is surely obvious. That would be stupid to hurt them or myself.

So once again I’m left with door number one, stay wired to smoking, or the other door, or choice. That gateway, or choice, would make me to become willing to be taken out of the three ring circus that is in my sick mind, and make the decision to walk out of there to freedom. I could stroll into the symbolic peaceful Meadow with the birds and their peaceful songs. To relax in the very green grass of home! There is no smoke in the air either! I am going to recall this lesson to my minds eye as often as I can today, and everyday. I am determined to see clearly.

The only thing we really have is the power of choice or decision. There really is only one choice! Yahoo! Please have fun, and don’t forget to be kind to yourself, and then you can extend that Self to others.

In my defenselessness my safety lies.

Opinion on Lesson 153 from A Course in Miracles.

The meaning of this lesson comes through loud and clear for me. I am not going to fight anyone or anything, and just let all things be as, he, she, it, them, us, you, me, they are.

If someone says something derogatory to me, I don’t have to defend it. I don’t take it personally simply because I have already gotten myself out of the way.

One of the biggest addictions going now-a-days is paranoia! It is rampant in the world at large because they’re a lot of folks that actually believe that the six PM radio/television news gods have clearly indicated that more conflict is on the way in the form of some event, some people, places or things. So we get ready for the fight, and wear our heavy armor, because the next barrage of “whatever” is just around the corner! Talk about imagination, and yet it is the sense of threat the world encourages that is so much deeper, and so far beyond the frenzy and intensity of which we can conceive, that we literally think ourselves into becoming sick, tired, lonely and afraid.

We become frightened of people, places, and things, and become weary, and so bled out after the days battles, that we barely make it home, usually after performing a job we don’t really enjoy, and then plop into the lounger, and turn on the six o’clock news again for another dose of death on the installment plan.

This lesson states obviously for me that I don’t have to accept the unacceptable, and I don’t have to judge it, decimate, analyze, figure it out, or try to get it my way. My way does not work; and although something or someone in my perception might be foolproof, well, they’re not God proof. It is then that I can go to the Holy Instant, give it to the Holy Spirit, whatever might be problematic for me, and therein lays the answer to the dilemma. I need to do nothing, just change my minds focus and let the Force bring me back to “no conflict”. Jesus says to just turn the other cheek. I keep my eyes on the road and the lights up ahead, instead of turning and holding attention to a distraction which has nothing to do with my goal. When I am driving a vehicle I don’t stare into the rear view mirror for directions either!

It’s as though I am once again preoccupied with past thoughts and outcomes as a quick fix to my trouble. When I am in that defensive state I have forgotten who and what I am. I have forgotten that nothing outside of my mind can hurt me, and I have forgotten that this “view of the world” that I have is coming from my frantic mind. The world, this body, and the mind I experience all of this with, are entirely neutral things, a blank canvas, and I could draw a beautiful picture of whatever I perceive if I were to be at peace, or defenseless. What is truth, our innocence, needs no defense.

To truly let go would be the easiest thing in the world because to let go, or forgive, is simple and easy and requires no effort. It is to lose my grip on trying to fix something or someone. It is all about “relax” and to stop taking everything here so seriously. There really is “nothing” to get upset about! I don’t perceive my own best interests anyways so why not just give it my best shot at whatever it is “I am” trying to accomplish, which is peace, and let the problems that don’t even exist go.

Defenselessness is strength. The choice is always made between Christ’s strength and my own weakness, seen apart from the Christ within. There is only one choice, unless I want to play an insane game!

I am going to be vigilant today for the Light, and I am not going to get caught up in a sick fragment of a dream, which just might come as attack on my “imaginary” personality. I want to play one of those happy games that teach that the game of fear is gone. I am, as often as I can remember, going to look for the light in everyone I meet today. For now, this instant, I will focus on the light within, and make certain that it is there, before I look out.

Be gentle with your self, have fun, and keep up the good work!


My mind holds only what I think with God. Lessons 148, and 149.

An opinion on the review in the A.C.I.M. workbook of the following lessons:

135: If I defend myself I am attacked,

136: Sickness is a defense against the truth,

137: When I am healed I am not healed alone,

138: Heaven is the decision I must make.


What a concept, and yet it happens all the time. I am attempting to hold in my mind only what I think with God, and yet if someone comes along that I am having some sort of issue with, that concept goes through the roof hatch in a hurry. I start to hold in my mind what I don’t like about that person, why they are such a bother to me, and how I can best get away from them! Thoughts such as those are not what The Strength of mind would have me think. Even when I am fond of someone, and I enjoy their company, but they have something against me, I quickly come to a defense posture and protect my fragile identity, or my imagined one anyways. Of course, the more I defend, the more I am attacked. When I start shoving others around, and start going for control, I am really just screwing myself, because simply put, giving and receiving are the same thing. You reap what you sow.  I can also add here that the same amount of energy exerted for defense, is proportionate to energy expended for attack! It is interesting to note that a countries defense budget, usually matches up with the war funding! When I think of it, I was paranoid for a lot of years, but I was so steeped in denial, I just thought it was normal to always be on guard. I was overly concerned of what “she or he, or them or us, were thinking about the special “me”. Today I am aware that what I think of others is more or less what I think of myself.  The more that fantasy starts becoming real for me, that The Host of Hosts has no idea of, well,when I get caught up in that paranoia, suspicion, fear,  crap its not a very good place to live, if at all. How could one lay claim to life if they are already dead?

In my sickness, and all illness is mental illness, which is just a defense against the Truth, I would become subject to infrequent temper tantrums, and I am surely not above having a hairy canary about multitudinous situations, people, places and things because they are not what I thought I wanted. Bear in mind that I could not perceive my own best interests anyways. Sick minds don’t heal sick minds. I can become very self-centred in this attitude, and this form of hallucination keeps me from the Truth. Just because I am taking subject matters that concern going beyond this world, does not denote that I am not in the world. The very reason I am here is because I am not all there. There is not one living soul on this earth that has not experienced these kinds of feelings of loneliness, isolation, sadness and depression. I am happy to report now, in this moment, that everyone on this planet is taking their own Course in Miracles, and coming out of the dark. All of us go through the mysterious and gloomy dark sections to get to the light. Jesus makes that very clear in the Course I am taking, and of course He is always pointing the way. He doesn’t get me out of hell, but He does give me clear directions which way to go. I have free will, and neither will He, the Holy Spirit or God Herself will interfere with that. It is clearly an inside job. It is all up to the self (Self) that I choose to be. The only thing we have down here is the power of decision. The ability to choose once again.

There is a way to get “there” though, and this happens when I take the lessons I am given each day, whatever they are, and clear my mind, after investigation with Spirit, of the subtle thoughts of shame, guilt, and fear, and let my mind hold only what it think with God. God would not have any of His Children thinking of such illusory body thoughts that are terror based. The brain, which is just another part of the body, downloads these ideas from the dark side of the mind, and projects them onto the world that I would experience, senses those ugly markers, reroutes them, and  makes them part of my belief system which I incorporate into my meaningless thoughts to send forth those tiny mad ideas again, and again. With mind training I am able to see these manifestations of negative aspects on the “outside”, and know that they are not out there, but emanating, developed, and sent out from my sick mind.

What is fascinating is that when these insane ideas are taken as real, they will literally make me sick, especially if I happen to know they are false, and so the “dark side” will try to keep me in this portable prison system, the body, by such bodily sensations as headaches, depression, gross body pains, dysfunctional organs, and all kinds of diseases from colds to cancer.

For me at least, at the beginning of “A Course in Miracles” journey, the more I uncovered the lies, and deceptions, it usually entailed me getting sick to keep me caught up in doubt. My dark side was trying to convince me that Heaven was a myth, and the body was real! These very uncomfortable distractions were often keeping me stuck because now my focus was on the world, and more specifically, my body.

When I started in earnest to be vigilant for the Truth, and not just talk the talk, but walk the walk, the path I was on got a lot more comfortable, and not so serious. Another thing I noticed almost all of the time was that there was nothing wrong with the world, and that God was in everything I sensed, simply because God was more and more in my mind. When I was healing I noticed frequently that people around me were healing too! Go figure! That was something I could not do, because most of my figuring and analyzing was paralyzing!  I got to see that my intellect was very limited and constricted. It was then that I realized I was starting to watch “miracles” taking place right in my face, when with the help of my Higher Self I got out of the “body” penal complex. I started to recognize the “separation” from others was just another part of the tiny mad idea that I had enemies. How can someone have enemies in truth? The world that I had made was totally upside down! I started to get out of the “special” concept and started to know that we are all pretty much the same. Now I get to see that aspect of the “me” show up quite often, and I smile when Self Realization kicks in, and I have no desire to be unique, or better than.

Eventually, Heaven became the decision that I must make, and when I started “walking” on the path with my Mighty Companions, Trusting Friends, the Holy Spirit or Jesus, and developed a faith that works, most of these bodily concerns would just disappear. I would at first start to smile more often, and then learn to laugh once again at these silly little ghosts from nowhere.

In closing, I have lots of work that lies within and ahead, but I am aware that the Love of God is in me now, and I don’t have to try and “run” from anything. There is absolutely nothing outside of me that can hurt the Real Self that I am today. Not even the worst nightmare can bring me any harm. For myself, it is all about trust.

Have fun, and don’t stop until the Miracle happens! Leave a comment, love hearing from you.



I will find the truth in my mind, and I can’t fail if I let go of what I only thought was real and through forgiveness find that pearl, at a seeming great cost, and then have a real gift forever!

Lessons 145, 146, and 147. My mind only holds what I think with God, and lessons (145) Beyond this world is a world I want and, It is impossible to see two worlds. (146)No one can fail who seeks to find the truth, and I loose the world from all I thought it was. Plus (147) I will not value what is valueless, and Let me perceive forgiveness as it is

I am writing this blog to incorporate, utilize and demonstrate how these three daily lessons in the workbook for students section of A Course in Miracles, can be brought to a practical demonstration, and in this case using “me” as an example.

Yesterday morning, one of the women that I live with, within our community home, was reminding me that the weather was going to be gorgeous for the day, but that the next day was going to be raining again, and that the “family” would appreciate it if I were to get my appointed chore of mowing the lawn around our home completed today as to better serve the other members of our household with the planting and weeding of the garden. I knew she was right, (although my knee jerk reaction in my wrong mind was more of “oh for %&*#s sake!!!) At the same time I had been planning on getting the blog done that I usually do in the mornings. Man oh man, what a world! Beyond this world is a world I want is right!!! I had some other plans already in motion as a friend and I had already decided to go for a hike in an earlier communiqué via text messaging  that very day, and it came down to a first things first kind of thing. First you get the chores done around the home, and then go for the adventure with your mighty companion in the afternoon.

I then got a call from my brother telling me that the server for my website was going to be down for a while for my website to make adjustments, and so, this being the case I commenced with the chores. Further along while I was going about my “due diligence” as a member of community, I had the insight of knowing that it is not possible to arrive at truth and ignore consciousness. As we all know this kind of stuff just pops into your head from nowhere, and then you just smile and proceed. Some folks call it a prompt, some call it a nudge, and others say it is a thought from your Higher Self, or God. Generally speaking it is what’s called intuition. It’s a win, win situation, and you can’t fail, just follow the proverbial yellow brick road to take you home. For me, it was just another example of the lesson that “no one can fail who seeks to reach the truth” in a practical application.

In my case I had to haul out the lawn mower that had not been used for about a year, and I hauled it out of storage where it was in the cold temperatures of Northern Canada, and it was certainly not starting up. So I had to fiddle and fuss with its mechanics and wires and plugs for about an hour and check all the components and clean this and that, and it was still not firing up! My fear steps in and comes out as a secondary emotion called anger, and I am a very good actor, and so was behaviorally calm while my mind was thinking angry stuff. Ah yes, the good old Jekyll and Hide routine! After rechecking everything over twice and continually cleaning as I went the unit started to look brand new! I seem at times to have to wait for a moment of desperation before I ask my Higher Power for help, and I did, and it was then that I realized that the mower was in a position on the grass that was still sodden with rain from the night before. The humidity or wetness from that was preventing a spark to occur to ignite the engine. I placed it in the early morning sunlight on the cement pad and left if for a while to go and have a coffee and a smoke, and just let go for a while. That’s cool though, as it is an exercise in patience in a symbiotic relationship with a machine. In my mind it was a kind of like a “Holy Encounter.” That lawn mower was an extension of me, and as one, we just wanted to get the job done. After my little respite from the situation, I came back to the scene and primed the engine, and pulled the start cord on the top of the unit. Voila! And nothing happens. I primed it again, pulled the cord, and nothing! This little love affair went on for quite a while and when she finally did roar into life after sitting in a waterless situation for a while, and getting dried out, it was a real hoot! I almost got down on bended knee and wanted to kiss her, but I knew that if I did that the folks in the house would think that I’d really hit the big time now!

If perchance I had done that positioning of the machine in the sunlight right from the start there would have been no problem! I only thought there was a problem with the machine where there really was none! As any mechanic will tell you, when working with machinery, at times you have to let go of any preconceived notions of why something is not functioning, and so in a sensible way, I loose the world from all you thought it was, simply because you don’t know, but are willing to find out, the heart or truth of the matter. It is hard to believe at times that the problem and the answer are always in the same place, but they are. There is the right mind, (the real world) or the wrong mind, (the illusory world) and between those two ideas is the decision maker, and through trial and error we become conscious of the power of that, the only real power we have is decision, and hence become more and more willing to choose once again. You are complete and total, but we forgot/forget that somehow! ( it does not matter how, your only responsibility is to correct the mistake or sometimes called sin.) and now we are starting to, or becoming more awake! We are seeing people, places, things, and events in this recreated world a lot differently than before. I am not a victim of the world I see, and I just start to see it with my right mind, and with the help of what I call the Holy Spirit, I am then able to see with the right mind. It is then that I start to realize that Heaven is being extended from my Divine Right Self onto the world. Wahoo! It is so cool when I know this because I have experienced this, and that it is impossible to see two worlds. I start to understand that there really are not limitless choices but only two. One or the other; God either is or God is not. What is valuable, or valueless? I am still in the same place as the day I was born, and I still have my friends, and all the other worldly stuff that I need or want, and that I can end up with a new kind of illuminated consciousness, that I have a mind that realizes that I have a source that I don’t have to understand, (just like a baby with its mother, or a child with its father) that is willing to help me perceive “all that is” in a spontaneous, powerful new way. What a trip! What an adventure, and what a life. I am no longer a walking, talking dead man, or brain washed robot. I am as God created me, whole and complete. I start to understand and know that rest does not come from sleeping, but from waking up!

So, I did get that chore done, the women in my home were pleased, the Mighty Companion did show up, we did have a great walk, we each had a coffee and some pastry, and I did get to hear the Holy Spirit talk through her! The message was loud and clear! Get your small self out of the way, so that great gifts can come! The other message which she always says is to get into the present, or now, because the present is the gift!

I will not value what is valueless, tastes pretty simple in the cafeteria of life. I tend to steer clear of the cakes and cookies, and other junk food that are laid out on the table primarily because I want to stay healthy. But every once in a while, I just can’t resist that ice cream, and I know that if I have one bite of it, I’ll develop in a short time the phenomenon of craving. It will be a case of “I bet you can’t just have just one scoop” scenario. And then I’ve taken the bait, and eat lots of it, too much in fact, knowing full well that it’s gonna have some weird side effects, in my case, a lot of agitation at the body level that usually comes out as excess excitability! I don’t think as clearly, and I almost always regret my choice of food at that particular time when I could’ve had vegetables, or fish, or whatever else was on the buffet, that was worthwhile for long-term nutrition. Even though I know from experience that the chocolate bar, the bottles of soda pop, and bags of potato chips we’re not conducive to good health, I ate them anyways. The result was always short-term pleasure followed by long term upset. It is when I am persistent in eating that kind of stuff for a long time that it can have some serious ramifications. The most common being obesity, all kinds of functioning in the body that goes awry, and now, I am dealing with a habit that has somehow turned into an addiction, slavery if you will, to the body, whereby I’ll take the short-term pleasure over the long-term pain knowing full well the harm that what it will cost me, and living in a diametrically opposed way of thinking knowing that I could have made a different choice. Once again the Jekyll and Hyde scenario shows up which is mentally, emotionally, and physically exhausting. To behave one way, and to know another is extremely tiring, and most folks need, even in this illusory world, at least eight hours of sleep to recover from the day! Eventually I’m faced with having to go on a diet which I find very hard to keep, but knowing that if I don’t keep it, I’m just going to get sick, and then it’s extreme application, it will kill me. Yikes! I’m not going to go into a 50 page dissertation on addictions, or slavery, or bad habits because if you are reading this you already understand this. Simply put: Tolerance for pain may be high, but it is not without limit!  It would entail changing my mind and learning I will not value what is valueless; decisions to either choose the valuable, or the valueless. Without help it is going to be too much for me, but there is one that has All Power, and being desperate, I am either going to live or die by my choice. What’s it going to be? It’s just a tiny mad idea! It’s like a born again non smoker telling a smoker to just quit, or someone who has never smoked advising “Just say NO!” The answer is surely obvious! Just as bizarre as a teetotaler telling a beta alcoholic to just stop drinking! It’s like a thin guy saying to an obese person to just stop eating so much! These are all answered in truth, but a sick mind does not know that!

I personally use to drink booze like a fish, but have not had a drop for many moons. I have suffered from many other addictions but they just fell away after realizing they were all a mistake. I had made the illusion a reality for me, and at one time I just could not imagine living without alcohol, much as some folks can’t imagine having no money. Some people can’t imagine being without their mate, or clothes, or car, and the list goes on and on. What happened to me, and so many others is that She/He has made the error real to themselves.  We have all at times had or are experiencing addictions and if you don’t think you have had one, well, you were mistakenly put on this planet. What do you need that body you are in for anyways?  This is where I can let me perceive forgiveness as it is. I can loose the world from all I thought it was and choose my own reality instead. True forgiveness would not make the mistake of seeing anything as an adjective such as slave, addict, smoker, drinker, overeater, or any other insane term. The Spirit of Forgiveness would show any of us that there are only two choices, and those are being One, or the other. With the “other” category the choices are limitless. You can try as many ways as you want. All of those ways will never satisfy your true nature. In so many ways I am still in the “other” category myself, but I am determined to see things differently! The point is that I am willing to outgrow my mistakes, and I am looking at changing my ways as best I can with the help of my True Mighty Companion, The Holy Spirit. That force is not peculiar to me, that anointed one is similar to all of us! Call it whatever you want, the Great Spirit, the Funness of Oneness, Good Orderly Direction, The Christ Within, The Tao, Mother Nature, Universal Consciousness, it really does not matter. Words don’t mean much anyways, but your intention of being honest with your Self will get you anywhere.

Right now in my life, my adventure of being here on this planet, I am faced with a similar dilemma. The Spirit of Love has given me a great gift to go to a place on a 10 day silent retreat. This was given to me from the Holy Spirit via a good friend I have. In a proper choice to go here I will be amongst other folks, that have a sincere desire to overcome their negative aspects via removing themselves from all sorts of the temptation’s of the world. They are voluntarily going to relinquish their cell phones, their books, their coffee drinking, pill taking, vitamins, smoking, computers, money, property, power, prestige, fame, fortune, medications, chants, beads, icons, clothing, make -up, fancy or revealing clothes and all other manner of bodily/worldly distractions/concerns. The exceptions are sleep, sanitary care items, shaving gear, and proper nutrition. The ten day silent retreat will serve as a platform to become much more aware of just how dependent they, and I, have grown on all kinds of egoic distractions that the dark side of themselves has persisted in over the years, which has been trying to find happiness in the “outside of the mind” (worldly, dualistic) circumstances for a long time.

There is just one glitch in this whole “Gift” at this mindfulness retreat that I have been given by the Holy Spirit that I don’t like at all! I have been a smoker since the age of 13 years and I am now a 61 year old smoker, and I can’t recall ever having gone more than two days without a cigarette, and that was only because I was locked up somewhere. I am also an avid fan of coffee, and coffee without a cigarette makes no sense to me whatsoever.  I currently smoke about 10 to 20 smokes a day. I usually drink about 3 to five cups of coffee per day. In other words I am a nicotine/caffeine addict. (That sounds so harsh, and yet, that is what guys like me are called! After all, I am a slave to those two things!) They don’t allow either of these substances into the retreat that I want, and I know (for sundry other reasons that would take another ten pages to describe) I need to go to. Now I am going to have to be honest. Either everything I have written in this blog is true, or it is all a pile of dung.  If it is all true, I won’t be smoking as of June 8, 2016 to meet my Heart’s desire. I won’t be drinking coffee on that date also. I am also reminding myself that there are only two choices and actually, that’s not true at all. There is only one choice. I want to go home.

The point of the whole exercise at the silent retreat for me will be the goal of knowing that this is the illusory world and that there is no out there- “out there”! It is all made up and I can choose to see this differently.

Have fun, and please leave a comment. I sincerely want to know what you think. You are my teachers and I want to learn!


My mind holds only what I think with God, and in quiet I receive God’s word, and remember all that I give is given to myself.

It is so blessed to know that in just a few moments, when I just relax and be still I can be at peace. I don’t have to sit in a certain way, and I don’t have to watch anything other than the thoughts that cross my mind, and discern which thoughts are mine, and which thoughts are Gods.

I don’t have to be a mystic or a saint, nor a guru or a high priest. I don’t have to be trained in “breath work” or impossible poses, or have on certain rings, or do chants or anything else. I am not saying not to do all of that if I were to feel it necessary, but for the average Joe like me, I don’t need it. (God just Is and comes to a quiet mind, preferably without the distracting baggage, or uncomfortable emotions and thoughts. You don’t have to try to get rid of the junk messages in your mind, just let your “Higher Self” take them away.) I do know from experience, that when I have driven heavy equipment across an icy terrain at 100 kilometres an hour, that I can still find those thoughts of “God”, real or imagined, that bring me peace and joy without losing focus on what I am doing in the here and now, at work or play. I just look at the thoughts of worry, frustration, fear, anger, greed, etc., and realize that those are not the thoughts of a loving God, whatever I might conceive or imagine that Idea to be. The “God” that has my attention is a very Loving force, or potential, and that power of Love is available to any living being, any time, anywhere no matter what!

When I make a small effort to start my day, especially one of those hurry, scurry, go-go days, with some loving thoughts towards people, places, things, and events, I usually have a much kinder more peaceful day even when I am going full tilt at whatever I am doing. If I get angry, sad, worried or frustrated I can just choose once again. There are basically only two emotions, and those are Love, or fear. I’ll choose the former any time, as the latter, as all of us already know, does not serve us well at all! To get caught up in “false evidence appearing real” makes no sense at all!

The benefits to others you might find yourself with can benefit immensely with your keeping your head, when everyone else is losing theirs! I have also found that when I am kind to folks, I get that kindness back, although I am not kind for some kind of payoff. It just feels good to be helpful if you can. We have all had so called “stress filled”, or, in other words fear filled days, and that’s OK too. It just teaches me that if I do happen to run across someone that is freaking out about some issue or other, I don’t have to be upset with them, just simply recall that I too have wigged out at times about nothing! When I just lend them an ear, and listen to their plight, I don’t have to say anything, just let themselves listen to themselves, and for the most part, they usually see that with a little “forgiveness” work, it all straightens out. In this case, by forgiveness I mean “forget about it”! We all make mistakes, and that is what gives us the lessons we need to learn. Ask any person that has a lot of experience in any arena of life, and they will tell you that they made a lot of mistakes to get there!

It is in gratitude that I slowly start to learn, and experience that my self-deceptions, about what and who I am, start to dissolve. Those little or big lies I tell myself in a state of denial are not the Truth. It is like a dog chasing it’s tail thinking that he is going to eventually catch it!  When I do stop to think about it, I can’t really recall at all what I was upset about yesterday, last month, or even years ago. I begin to see that it is all transitory, and down here on this plane of existence life just happens, with or without my consent. It is just a matter of accepting all that happens to us as what it is. It is also a development of trusting in the “Good and Whole” in all that is. We as a collective mind, have spent a lot of time trying to figure out why this is that, and that is this, and yet we don’t get answers right away. Sometimes we don’t get answers at all, and that’s OK too. Sometimes too the answers come right out of nowhere, simply because we stopped worrying about it, and just let all things be as they are.

Today is going to be a great day for all of us if we let it be that. I don’t have to fight myself or anyone else to have peace. I don’t have to get my way to know happiness. After all, if you are anything like me, my ways are often the wrong way, but that’s how I learn. Today, as often as I can, I will just be still, if only for an instant, and hear a word from a Higher Source, a Peaceful Source and a Loving one too. From that word or words, I will act on it/them and become a kinder, more loving and compassionate human being. Have fun!


My Mind holds only what is important and essential to me.

Hello Friends,

My name is Mark and I not only have an acute (at times) perception addiction, I also have an insatiable craving for the truth. The phenomenon of craving can only happen after you have had a taste of the real thing! It is not an addiction as in being a fanatic entails my being a slave to something or someone. I am not a hostage to this world or any facet of it, and if you are reading this neither are you!

My good friend, my Brother David, gave me this website for a birthday present this year, and with the help of some friends entitled it: Whole Soul Experience. In other words that could be said as “A Holy Encounter”. I am presenting this as my first blog, and I am not a professional anything right now. I am simply a person whom desires the real deal, and I am getting that by being a student of A Course in Miracles. I know only a little, but I do have a fervent desire to share the little I have with whoever might be reading this! You did not get this message that follows by mistake, as I already know that you too are curious about “what is” and “what is not”. I am doing this only because I am feeling that it is what I was meant to do, or my part in the “whole” or “one” or purpose while I am here.

I must say that I have selfish reasons for writing all of this down because I know that I will grow from it also by merely being who and what I am at this moment. These are actually notes to My One True Self. I am aware that I might make mistakes along the way, but hey, that is all good too. I am not a master at anything. I am a part of all that is, just like you, and I would just like to do, as much as I am willing, to fulfill my purpose, and that is to accept the undoing of my mind of all of the mistaken thoughts I have had, do have, and will have in this linear time line we collectively call life.

I did not know where to start so I thought I would just start from where I am at, and that happens to be with this lesson that is in A Course in Miracles, and somehow it seems very appropriate for the beginning.

So here goes, we are all Loved, and it does not matter what you call it, IT LOVES YOU!

                                                      My Mind holds only what I think with God.


What a statement!; and yet it is true. I am a Son of God, and the first two words of the Lord’s Prayer states that completely. Our Father, not my Father, and so I know I am not some orphan, or something lower than. We are all equal. The name of God is my inheritance, and so, being created in God’s image and likeness and as being Spirit that is all that I really am, and all that I Am can really think of. I add here that God is in no way a “body”, and unfortunately that is exactly what some of us think of somehow, and yet we know that Spirits don’t have them. Why would they even want them? All of the rest, the worldly thoughts, that were made up by the identification with “me, I, and my” and have no real value, simply because all that is made, manufactured or conceived of eventually falls apart, crumbles, and is no more. Ashes to ashes dust to dust. Illusions, smoke and mirrors, and lots of magic, or sleight of hand, ideas, places, species and events which eventually, in and of themselves means nothing. Nothing in this world, universe, galaxy or anywhere is real, and hence there is no real satisfaction; fleeting yes, forever, no.

The other way of looking at it is that, Forgiveness is the key to happiness and Forgiveness offers everything I want. (W.141) Everything that “I Am” is eternally happy, loving and at peace. If I want more than all else to be happy I am going to have to go with either the world and its ephemeral gifts, which offer only limited and time based contentment, or go with limitless forgiveness which is of the sane mind, and goes beyond materialism straight to the Spirit or “I Am” which has no beginning or end. Bye-bye duality! It just is. The key is willingness to look at the distractions of the world, and its myriad choices, or to go to the Spirit which is in reality, after all is said and done, the one and only option.

Forgiveness means to me to overlook anything, any time, and any all of my so called problems, and through desire for truth being willing to let them all go. They serve no real purpose for me now.

Now is all there is of time, as it does not have a past or a future, and this instant of time is the gateway to infinity. The key is to look at anything of this world, which was made up by “the collective me” (all of us) as a distraction against the Truth which is of God, and have the willingness to let it all go, even if it is one thing, time, place or situation at a time. This requires constant vigilance and was not and is not always an easy thing to do for myself because I still have a sick mind; but with mind training, and help from mighty companions (angels, friends, spirits, books, videos etc.) all of us can get there. Sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly, it does not matter; we are all going to evolve to acquire the great fact that we are just Love eventually. The Beatles said it best in that hit song, All You need is Love! It is just that while I am here in this illusory world, in my made up fantasy dream, to remind myself as often as I can remember, that this is not the “Real” world, and it was made up by all of us as a perplexity and complexity against the simple truth. I am a bit of a science junkie and the internet is full of scientists of all types and description concurring that this world is just a figment of your imagination! Nothing here lasts and only Truth is true.

The Peace of God is my one aim and solitary goal, and the discipline of Forgiveness will get me there in an instant when I remember the key to those seemingly locked doors in my mind that are a bar, or defense against verity, to what I truly desire.